Red
Hook is a rich, vibrant, diverse community of
people. Before arriving on location for my
volunteer placement, I never knew people
actually talked to their neighbors, lived down
the block from the rest of their family, or hung
out in the local barbershop/arcade/convenience
store. Doesn’t this only happen in the movies?
“What planet am I on,” I would ask myself as I
watched children meet for fights around the
corner or conduct step practice on the sidewalk.
Maybe I should preface this all by saying that I
have never played with the neighbor’s kids. I’ve
never lived in one house. In fact, before the
age of 11, my parents and I bounced around from
apartment to apartment every couple of years.
One might even venture to call me “rootless.” To
find myself, a transient, in a neighborhood so
firmly planted in the ground, was strange. I
felt like I was marked from the beginning as a
foreigner. Anything I did or said would stick
out. I’d never be accepted or made to feel part
of but always apart from. From the outside, Red
Hook seemed impenetrable.
I
met Angelica initially when I was assigned to
sit with her group during snack until her group
leader arrived. She was an amicable 7 year old
after school participant who didn’t cause
trouble or get into fights: the kind of kid we
love to foster in our program. She loved to
share what she had learned in school earlier
that day and joined in conversation with her
classmates on various topics including BarbieÒ
and butterflies. But Angelica and I really got
to talk in the evenings while waiting for her
mom to come pick her up. When it was dismissal
time the last few kids would come into the
office and Angelica would pull up a chair next
to me and chat me up about everything. One
particular evening, I showed Angelica a simple
handshake. The next day we greeted each other in
this manner. And the next day. And each day
following. I came to expect it. If I walked by
and she saw me coming, she would gently tap me
and hold out her fist waiting for me to join in
our tradition. No matter what kind of day I was
having, it truly brought joy to my experience to
know that Angelica had given me some stake in
Red Hook, some sense of tradition to hold on to.
At the risk of sounding cheesy, Angelica
single-handedly rooted me in the program. I am
so thankful for her way of including me and when
I leave in July, I’ll keep the memory of our
friendship.
I
believe relationships are a powerful tool in
growing into your best self. A relationship that
is healthy challenges you to rise up from your
current state and to delve into a more
meaningful you. Angelica’s friendship was a way
to do this without the added complications that
getting older in our society provide. The
simplicity of a child’s affection brought me
through this year, humbled me, and showed me the
meaning of belonging.
